In this episode, I’ve invited three women on the show who also happen to be my dear friends — they don’t know each other, but I’ve known them for decades. And in this past year, I’ve watched each of them explode with creativity. Carolyn Blank Cary published a cookbook, which became a mini memoir; Beth Huddleston developed an app introducing infants and toddlers to the sounds of languages and music from around the world; and Amy Meyers pivoted from a lifetime of executive recruiting and political consulting and started her own business, Mrs. Meyer’s Etiquette. All of these women are over 60, which on its own is inspirational. But more importantly, they’re using their creativity for connection — to create a world where people are kinder to one another, understand one another, and break bread with one another.
In this episode, I’ve invited three women on the show who also happen to be my dear friends — they don’t know each other, but I’ve known them for decades. And in this past year, I’ve watched each of them explode with creativity. Carolyn Blank Cary published a cookbook, which became a mini memoir; Beth Huddleston developed an app introducing infants and toddlers to the sounds of languages and music from around the world; and Amy Meyers pivoted from a lifetime of executive recruiting and political consulting and started her own business, Mrs. Meyer’s Etiquette.
All of these women are over 60, which on its own is inspirational. But more importantly, they’re using their creativity for connection — to create a world where people are kinder to one another, understand one another, and break bread with one another.
Takeaways:
Resources:
Amy (00:04.366)
I'm Amy Meyers of Mrs. Meyers Etiquette.
Carolyn
Hi, I'm Carolyn Blank Cary, author of “Carolyn Cooks And So Can You!”
Beth
I'm Beth Huddleston, creator of the firstSounds app.
This is no time to be timid.
Tricia (00:33.582)
Hey there, I'm Tricia Rose Burt, and in this podcast, we talk to artists who show us how to find the courage to take risks, step out of our comfort zones, and use our creativity to make our work and change our world. Pay close attention, because this is no time to be timid.
Hey there and welcome to the show. We're halfway through our season. And so far, we've heard from an actress and bestselling author, a former mayor, another bestselling author and visual artist, an award-winning chef, and a country music icon. In this episode, we're gonna do something a little different and talk to, well, more regular folks, folks like you and me, who are doing amazingly creative things on a smaller scale. At least for now, it's smaller, but no less important.
I've invited three women on the show who also happen to be my dear friends. They don't know each other, but I've known them for years. And in this past year, I've watched each of them explode with creativity. A lifelong artist, Carolyn Blank Cary published a cookbook of family recipes, which also turned out to be a mini memoir, her life told in food. Beth Huddleston, who's built a career in international affairs, learned how to develop an app and relaunched her 30-year-old passion project, firstSounds, which introduces infants and toddlers to the sounds of languages and music from around the world. And Amy Meyers pivoted from a lifetime of executive recruiting and political consulting to start Mrs. Meyers Etiquette. She's a certified etiquette trainer, helping others develop the skills and confidence they need to shine in their professional and personal lives.
All of these women are over 60, which on its own is inspirational, but more importantly, they're using their creativity for connection, to create a world where people are kinder to one another, understand one another, and break bread with one another.
Some takeaways from our conversation include your childhood interest will likely turn out to be your adult passions. No one will have as much excitement for your project as you do, so take ownership of it if you want it done well. You may feel overwhelmed pushing yourself out of your comfort zone but you'll also feel alive. And either go big or go home.
These women exemplify the phrase, this is no time to be timid. It's a terrific conversation and I'm so glad you're joining us.
Well, hello everybody. It's so good to have you on the show. I'm so excited to see you. It's Amy Carolyn. Hello.
Amy
Hello, Tricia, thanks for having us.
Carolyn
Hello, Tricia.
Tricia
And Beth, how are you?
Beth (03:19.414)
I'm doing great, can't wait to jump right in.
Tricia
Well, I'm so excited you're here. I'm gonna start by asking, how long have you had this idea in your head? Beth, I'll start with you just because I know a little bit about what you've been up to. So how long have you had the idea of firstSounds in your head?
Beth
I have had this idea of firstSounds in my head for probably close to 30 plus years and it has been, had different lives and I think one of your manifestos about no idea, no creative venture goes, you know, is wasted and I've definitely felt that with firstSounds. It's been a long journey and I feel like I've entered the new age with it.
Tricia
Because you originally started doing it for your own children and now you’re doing it for your grandchildren.
Beth
That's a little scary when you put it into that context. But yes, that is absolutely true. I had the idea of introducing language and music to my children. And I came out with a version of it that was cassette tapes and stuffing it in a vinyl cover and all of the things you did with cassette tapes. And now it's entered the new age as an app. So yes, it's been a long time in coming a long transitional birthing process, so to speak.
Tricia
Okay, and Carolyn, how about you? When did you get the idea in your head for the cookbook?
Carolyn
November of 22. My children, we ate Thanksgiving away from the house. And they were just like, okay, no. I mean, we cannot not have your food, our food. And what are we gonna do? I mean, they were just like panicked. And my son was really like, write them down, write the recipes down. And you know, and then I was like, okay, I'll write them down. And then I thought, you know, I'm gonna do a book. I'm gonna do a cookbook. And then it just...really morphed into this bigger, much bigger thing that I thought I was doing through 23 and then birthed in 24..
Tricia
So what did you think it was going to be at first? Just like a couple of handwritten recipes so your kids can make Thanksgiving dinner?
Carolyn
Yeah like a little pamphlet, stapled, know, nothing going to a printing. And then it became obvious when I started talking about it with my friend who is a printer. And she's a, yes, we can do it. You know, she's just always been very inspirational with me. I mean, I would come to her and go, what do you think about blah, blah, blah? And she's like, absolutely, we'll do X, Y, and Z. I mean, as children, we were always contemplating. Well, how can we get this done? You know, so anyway, she was like, oh, absolutely, we can do it. And I wanted a pamphlet. I wanted a spiral, you know, something that a cook actually would use. I did not want a book that looked like a coffee table book with photographs all in it, you know? And so I knew I had this idea and then it became go big or, you know, go home. And I literally just got every recipe that I've ever made a million times and put it in the book. And then I contacted friends and family and were like, number one recipe that you, your signature recipe I need for the book. And they did it.
Tricia
Okay, that's fantastic. Okay, Amy, how about you? When did you get your idea?
Amy
I think almost two years ago, I'd been casting about for really what God wanted me to do next. And I saw an ad on Instagram, one spot left in a train-the-trainer etiquette class, probably a marketing ploy, and I signed up.
Tricia
Because I love the pivot. Tell them what you did before you started Mrs. Meyer's etiquette.
Amy
Well, I had a couple of careers. I was a headhunter for an executive. I did executive search. I did consulting for leadership consulting for nonprofits. And then my last iteration was I ran a political consulting firm. We did high dollar, well, all dollar fundraising for candidates and organizations nationally.
Tricia (07:31.022)
And now she's running an etiquette service.
Amy
Yeah, very different from the kind of copy we used to write for. My messaging is very different than it used to be.
Tricia
But I like again that I do that flexibility, the agility of saying, okay, this is what I've done and now I'm gonna use and just come up with something completely different. One of the things, one of the reasons why I wanted all of y'all to be on the show, selfishly is because you're all women over 60. Apparently we're supposed to be invisible after 60, but it does not look like this crew is gonna do that. And so the more people I can, you know, more of you I can put out there, the better. But also I wanted to have y'all on the show because, as I even mentioned at the top of show, all of your creativity is around connecting people in either a more civilized way or a more creative way. And so I want to talk a little bit about why do you think what you're doing is important?
Amy
You know, we have this epidemic of loneliness and isolation the Surgeon General decreed it a couple of years ago, that you see increased political polarization. Arthur Brooks, who used to run the American Enterprise Institute, wrote a book, talks about how it used to be we would be friends with people of different political parties, different religions, and now we tend to just be with people who think like us. It's not, not just probably not us, but as a country. And I think by teaching manners and through manners, etiquette, it's a way of connecting people. You're teaching kindness. I hope I'm training kindness and consideration and respect for our fellow man and listening skills and a desire to know and understand the other.
Tricai
I want you to just quickly though talk about how weird your social media experience has been? Okay, because apparently there is a hunger for this is the reason why I'm pointing this out.
Amy (09:31.436)
My daughter helps me with this business. I couldn't really do it without her. And she suggested we do a Mrs. Meyers Etiquette Instagram as a way to promote in person or virtual training. And I had 250 followers. So we just started in the fall, probably November, right? I had 250 followers on Christmas Eve. I did a video, a reel on Instagram – when do you put your napkin in your lap? That has had 2 million views, it went viral and I now have almost, I'll probably hit 79,000 followers today, which makes me a micro influencer working towards actual influencer, I guess. Now, where that's gonna go or how to monetize it, we're still figuring out. It's fabulous. I mean, people comment, people send me DMs. You know, I hear about my stepchild’s getting married, should I invite my siblings? My kids, how much money, know, the bride's family is putting in this much, how much should I put in? How do I kindly tell my son-in-law not to wear his baseball cap at the table? I spend a lot of time writing people back, and I love it.
Tricia
Well, but I think what's interesting though, it's just that there's so much interest in being nice, behaving well, behaving in a civilized way. And I just think it's really interesting that it's gotten this much traction that people – I thought nobody cared anymore. And so it's really interesting that it's actually gotten some real traction. And also it was hysterical to say she had 250 on Christmas morning and then I was like, I'm just watching this thing snowball over the napkin video.
Amy
When you put the napkin in the lap. And the other interesting thing, I was just looking at the numbers the other day is the female followers tend to be older, 45 to 75. The men are younger. Oh, interesting. And I don't know, you know, that I think is interesting too.
Tricia (11:37.528)
Well, it's nice to know there's men that are following you.
Amy
Oh yeah, they write to me all the time.
Tricia
And so Carolyn, why do you think it's important to have these recipes saved, because now you're in your second printing of the cookbook. Right. And so again, this is getting traction. People are really, you know, excited about what you're putting out there. What do think all the energy is about around your cookbook?
Carolyn
I found out early on in my life that the only real thing that you have is the love in your heart. And everything else is just a bunch of smoke and mirrors. And when I started putting this together, it was out of love for my family and my friends that I did what I did, which was cook stuff, you know, food. I mean, I had originally was an artist and my children were little. And I was like, touch my paints again and I'm going to bend your fingers back. I mean, it was not, I was not a nice mommy. You know, and I was like, yeah, this is not good. You know, so I need a way to create and then we can eat it, you know, and everybody, I can teach them and we can just that has always been a soulful place in my childhood as well. Food was a big deal. So, and being together and eating and yum, yum, yum, you know, so when I put this thing together, it was from the heart completely and to bring joy. There is a lack of joy, I believe. You know, people are, it's just a different culture right now. And I think people need to create and just get out there and find your, you know, find your little thing that you do and do it and share it with your friends and your family. And that's all to me that it's about. It's just the love in my heart and putting out some joy.
Tricia
You came out of the womb making things. Like you have been an artist forever.
Carolyn
I've been, as I say, an actress.
Tricai
Yeah, I mean, painting and recovering, you're doing this fabulous upholstery and that you had a company called Nutty Girl for a long time that was creating fabulous nuts. I mean, tell just a little bit about Nutty Girl real quick.
Carolyn
Nutty Girl was, you know, a happy accident. I had made this nut mix and took it to my sister for Thanksgiving and she had a shop at the time and she was like, can we put it in my shop? And I was like, okay. I mean, you know, I knew nothing. I mean, that was just like, and then it became a thing. And it was just like, I had to end up going and getting boxes and you know, I sold it all over the US and I did all sorts of, it just became, it blew up and it was super fun. And I was the Nutty Girl for seven years and had a blast. And my kids were involved. I mean, they helped me package and ship and we had a blast doing it. It was really fun. But I retired from Nutty Girl in 2011 and really haven't done a lot of anything until this project, which was the book.
Tricia
Well, you know, a lot of anything that means, I know you, you've been making...
Carolyn
That means out in the world. mean, yeah, that means that doesn't mean at home. I mean, I'm doing a lot at home, but I mean, I'm like, you know, putting myself out in a big way. You know, I had retracted from that and spent, you know, 11 years basically getting my kids into high school, college. That's a very busy time, you know.
Tricia
Yeah, yeah. so, Beth, how about you? Why do you think it's important for you to do what you're doing right now?
Beth
Well, first of all, I just think that this is an amazing time in our lives, each of us being in our 60s, and we are definitely not invisible. And that creative force, for some reason, I think is almost all of the things that we've had to do are in a way not behind us, but not in the forefront. And it's a time that we can really start being creative. I just applaud both of you, Carolyn and Amy, and also what I'm trying to do is these are legacy projects. You said from the heart, how do you monetize? It's not even necessarily that important to me. I just wanted to bring something that had been a passion of mine in my 30s. It's still alive and well and it's still a passion of mine. And I think my project is a little bit more difficult to describe, you know, being an app, introducing babies to languages from around the world. But it is about connecting and it's about bringing joy to the world and for little children to start understanding that people do speak different languages and there are different types of music out there. And then when you think about, you know, bringing that into the world, you know, I even said to Tricia at one point,
you i don't even care if this makes any money i just wanna bring it out in the world i just want you know for people to experience something that i think is important and that if it's important to me I'm sure there's a as following a people that will embrace it and want their children to be introduced to the languages and music of the world but you know to me that topics that we have here you know we have cooking what is more about bringing people together than cooking and sitting around a table and then even more important than that is people sitting around the table with good manners. I wish I had had that course with my children and fortunately now there's a new generation that can have that. So anyway, just think to me it's about a legacy project, but I think it's also very current and relevant and people wanting to connect in different ways.
Tricia
And give a little bit of background though. So you've been the chief of protocol in Dallas for how many years?
Beth
Directly for the mayor of Dallas for four years and then I worked for the city through a contract for 18 years. So, you know, lot of that is etiquette and protocol and people knowing the right thing to do. You know, I was just, when Amy was talking about it, you know, if we could just maybe pass a bill that said every politician needed to take an etiquette course and, you know, on manners and, you know, civility and all of that, I think maybe all the world's problems would almost be solved if we did that. So I'm all for that. But to me, it's a little bit about people also understanding that people hate to come into a situation and not know what to do, like which is my wine glass or which is my water glass or which is my fork. And so it's about creating comfort for people. And I just think etiquette is just so fundamental to everything we do. Yeah, protocol has a lot of etiquette involved in it and I'm just excited to learn about this new resource with Mrs. Meyers etiquette. I'm looking forward to using that for a lot of things that I'm involved in.
Tricia
We've got some cross pollination here, right? After this, there's a business that the three of you can start together. But you've been in international relations, I mean, for a very long time. And I've had the pleasure of watching you develop firstSounds. So tell me if I'm saying this correctly about what it does. And there's a time in babies’ lives where they're the most able to learn audio. It's zero to six months, but can happen later. And so Beth's app plays lullabies from around the world and languages from around the world so these little babies' brains get the neural pathways. So when they go to Spanish class at HB Plant high school, they can actually pronounce the words correctly and retain it and not forget everything like I did. So it's preparing these babies to be able to have a better ability to communicate in a foreign language growing up. Did I do that well?
Beth
You did it extremely well. Sound is one of the first senses. Even in the womb, babies can hear sounds so hearing different sounds just expands the neural pathways and the ability to hear those sounds later in life. Sometimes the problem with learning a language, a different language, is it's not even about the mouth. It's that you can't even hear the difference in a sound. the earlier you can prime the brain with these different sound pathways, you have at least the ability to hear that there's a difference between an R and an L, which can be difficult for some languages. So it's just a way of nurturing the baby's brain and little children as well. You know, there's research that the earlier the better, but almost up to puberty, the mind, and even beyond. mean, you still have the ability, but it's much easier the earlier that you learn or exposed to different skill sets and different sounds especially because that is the first sense that is truly the babies come out listening and hearing things. And then comes the speaking and other, obviously sight is in there, but for language it's about hearing the sounds.
Tricia
So I want to ask all three of you just when the seed got planted for you. So I know with you, Beth, you had a fabulous Madame Alexander doll collection. Was that correct?
Beth
I did, I did. Dolls from foreign lands. And I was just fascinated with what all these different little girls were wearing from all over the world. My godmothers would give me a different doll every birthday or Christmas or for any holiday. I'd get a different Madame Alexander doll.
Tricia
Well, and so the way that played out is just this fascination with all things foreign for the rest of your life. I mean your honeymoon, you were gone for like 18 months and went to 28 countries.
Beth
Exactly. Yeah, I've just had a lot of interest in just other cultures. You know, obviously food, know, food is a big one and the sounds of languages and just different people's customs, their etiquette, you know, it all comes together. It's just a fascinating group that we have here because there's different parts to this connectivity, different ways of connecting with people through language, through cooking, through eating, through just observing each other's customs.
Tricia
Carolyn, when did you start cooking?
Carolyn
I think I was six and Ricky came to me.
Tricia
Ricky, brother. Ricky, your brother.
Carolyn
Ricky, my brother, came to me and I was down in kitchen with him looking for food and he was like, do you wanna make muffins? And I was like, I do wanna make muffins. mean, you know, and so he was five years older than me. So he got the box down and it was that, you know, Duncan Hines wild blueberry thing. And he showed me how to do it. He asked with the can of blueberry and he showed me the box and we read each step and we did exactly what it said to do and we poured it in the pan and put it in the oven and then 20 minutes later we were like, yeah, I mean, I was like, okay, I'm in, I'm in with this. I will be eating with you. I mean, we are in, you know, so, and then it just morphed into – my best childhood friend, she was the same way. We were always looking for food and we would get together in her mother's kitchen when we were seven and like create messes, but we would make things. And so I never stopped, never stopped. I learned from that point on and I was like making grilled cheese sandwiches. And then I was, I took a year of cooking at the Academy my senior year and I learned so much.
Tricia
You could take cooking classes at the Academy?
Carolyn
Well, yes, because I certainly wasn’t going in Chemistry. Okay. You know, and they were like, but you can cook. And I was like, I will cook. I will bring the food, you know? And so I took a year. I, you were only supposed to take a semester. And I went to my teacher and said, please let me take another year, another semester. And we went to the principal. went to Sister AV and she said, you can do it. And I was like, yes. And I learned like soup to nuts. We, I mean, we literally started with, you know, all the tools in the kitchen to, you know, desserts and everything in between. And it was fascinating and I was just hooked and never, never have stopped.
Tricia
So I just had no idea that you had that experience.
Carolyn
Yeah, it was awesome.
Tricia
I just love how things younger shaped. And so Amy, how about you?
Amy
I had a grandfather with whom I was very close who grew up very poor in the hills of North Carolina and had made good. It was very important to him that it was a way to fit in and promote success. And then I had a grandmother on the other side who had come from a very affluent family, was very ladylike and everything was very proper and I was very close to her. So I think probably that, and we always sat at the dining room table for dinner growing up, you know, 6:30 and there were too many of us to sit, there were five of us, too many of us to sit at the kitchen table so we always ate in the dining room, you know, with the silver and the china and all that. So I think it's, and then grandparents died and I got the stuff and I think it, I've just, it's always been part of me. And I love to entertain. It's that, think Beth or Carolyn, one of you was talking about connection, right? And I think of, I love that Howard's End by EM Forster, and the first line is “only connect.” I think he's really talking about your head and your heart, but I like to think about connecting people and that entertaining and graciousness and civility is a way to connect people and bring people together.
Tricia
Would you please tell what you used to do when Lucy was in the hospital?
Amy
So my daughter was very ill when she was probably 18 years old and she had anorexia. And she was at Children's Hospital, big fan of Children's Hospital on 7 West. And we knew she was going in the hospital and I packed my bag, I was going, because I stayed in the hospital with her. And I brought linens, placemats and napkins, several different sets. And I guess I felt I could control the outcome through prayer and civility. The second we landed in the hospital, I called Winston Flowers in Boston and I had flowers delivered to her room, flowers delivered to the nurses' stand, and every meal, a nurse had to supervise all her meals. But before the tray would come in, I would put out a, you know, place mat, a linen place mat and a napkin. Many of them came from my grandmother had flowers embroidered on them or whatever. And anyhow, she's thriving now. So something must have worked.
Amy
I just love that. We're going to make this work between prayer and civility. And the fact that you were setting this lovely table for someone who was struggling around the idea of eating, I thought was just the loveliest thing to do. I really did. It was great.
We'll get back to the second half of our conversation in a moment, but right now I want to tell you about our sponsor, Interabang Books, a Dallas-based independent bookstore which was named one of the country's top five bookstores by Publishers Weekly. They have a fabulous curated online collection and it's just as easy to shop with them as it is with Amazon. Who doesn't want to support an independent bookstore? Please show them some love and check them out at interabangbooks.com.
That's Interabang, I-N-T-E-R-A-B-A-N-G, books.com.
Tricia
What has surprised you guys in making these things? how have you surprised yourself? Have you gone like, I never thought I could do this before, or this was just waiting to happen? Or like, what, you know, I mean, what have you found out that makes you go, yay me.
Beth
Well, I'd love to jump in on this one because everything we've talked about has been so positive and the outcomes have been good, but I never in a million years thought it would be so hard to make an app. I mean, we just click on them on our phone and these things just pop up. And I'm thinking, well, how hard could it possibly be? And I started on this, just the app portion, not the idea portion. I've worked on that for years and months and whatever but
the actual building of the app, I started in like October and I'm still, it is ready and it's ready to go. You know, I mean, it was every night talking to people in India. I was working with Indian app developers that I had found and I'm thinking, well, you how hard can that be? Well, you know, I'm exhausted and there, you know, we're all, and they were just waking up in the morning and I'm trying to go to bed and you know, half the time I'm sure they're thinking, who is this, you know, American woman that we're talking to on the other end of the world. I just didn't realize how hard it would be. But then I also, it made me feel so alive. I mean, it was just such a, like I would go to bed, just my head would be hurting. But I'd wake up the next morning just feeling so like I had accomplished something in each step of the way. So it pushed me, it extended my...I just didn't, first off know it would be that hard, once I found out it was that hard, I wasn't sure I could do it. And it was such a satisfying experience to be on the other end where now I'm actually talking about people downloading my app. But that was surprising to me, Tricia.
Beth
You showed, I've watched you through this process and I mean, her meetings would be at 11 o'clock at night. I mean, I would have just been cross-eyed talking about an app at 11 o'clock at night with people across the world. And you just found out so much about yourself that like, you know, I've watched you transform in this process and we have this conversation about how you were talking about what it's like for you as Chief of Protocol in Dallas and you're like, well, I, you know, I own that place. You know exactly what to do when you walk into City Hall in Dallas. And now it feels like you own this whole app situation. Like you've really stepped in into your authority there to just take command of that.
Beth
And I do have to say that when I first launched this product 30 years ago, I had ownership of it. I knew the development of it and the marketing, et cetera, but the world has changed since then. I, for a number of years, just wanted somebody else to do it for me. I just went, can't somebody else just figure this out? And then once I realized nobody else was as passionate about it as I was, that I needed to roll up my sleeves, learn a new skill, get out of my comfort zone. I wasn't gonna be timid. I just had to be bold and along the way I've worked with Tricia on her great skill set of pushing people out of their comfort zone. And so yeah, just had, I couldn't let other people do it. Nobody else was as passionate about it as I was. And I needed to just do it myself in this young age.
Tricia
The common fact between the three of you is you are all three fearless, which is why I'm like, this is a good trio to have together. Cause it's not, I mean, you haven't gone like, no, I can't. It's like, I'm doing that, you know? So Carolyn, I mean, how about you? What surprised you in the process? Cause I also know you've talked to me about it and that you had, you had a crew of women that were helping you with this, with this project as well.
Carolyn
Oh my God, totally. First off, it was such a deep dive into myself and into my life and what I had been doing because when I first started out, I'm gonna do, I'm just gonna do these recipes. And then it was just like, came into my head, like go big or stay home. Don't not do it right. I mean, so I have four books that I've handwritten that I cook out of. And then I have, books in my shelves. I mean so I went everywhere and dug up everything I possibly could and had to beat it out of all my friends and family too, because you know, it's like, I need the recipe, you know, whatever. But I found my whole life in a book that I had no idea that that was going to happen. Absolutely not. And then the other thing that I..
Tricia
When you say you've found your whole life in a book, what do you mean?
Carolyn
Well, it was just from the very beginning when I started collecting recipes when I was 19 years old to now when I'm making my own and I've morphed into so many things because I'm a vegan now. I mean, like everything is so different. I had my whole life. I mean, like when my husband came into my life, when my children came into my life, when my sister was here, when, you know, all the things, my brothers and, you know, all the things that they brought to the table, I just was there in the middle of it, just looking at it going, wow, this is the last 40 years of my life. It turned into like a little biography. And then in each recipe, because I was honestly writing it for my children, I was talking like I was talking to them. I will say this might go fast, turn the heat down, mix it with this. And in the end, I would have little antidotes or little stories at each end of most of the recipes saying, this is why I did it, or I like it this way, or you may find this X, Y, and Z. And a lot of people have commented to me that this book is like a little novel. I mean, it has this...a feeling in these recipes that normally it's just cut and dry, you know, chop, cook, bake. That's it. You know, it doesn't say I burnt it five times. Don't walk out when you're doing X, Y, and Z. Okay. You know, like stuff like that. So it gives it life. And, I just had no idea that this thing was going to turn into this, just treasure of my stories and I did put a lot of artwork and pictures and I've had more people call me and go, okay, I cried after I read that cookbook. And I'm just like, well, okay, you know, I mean, it's just like, brought them to tears. I mean, they were just like, oh my God, or, you know, tell more stories, put more recipes in there. And I'm like, you know, we're done, but it was way bigger and way more a big piece of me than I ever thought, I mean, had no clue.
Tricia
Well, I have your cookbook. I love your cookbook. You know, so yeah, there's a couple of times, there are places that are very moving in the book as well. But I think it is, it's like there is so much life in the cookbook.
Carolyn
The thing about the book is that the recipes are easy. Nothing in there is like, okay, you know, I made it so you can make it in like, you know, a short period of time and eat it. It's not something that is going to hinder you. And I want people to feel comfortable in the kitchen. I do. And especially my children. I was like, it needs to be just something that you do not something like, I can't believe I have to do. It is a part of self care.
Tricia
Yeah, that's great. Amy, what surprised you in this process?
Amy
Well, first I have to say, Carolyn, I appreciate and find helpful your position that cooking is a part of self care because I think after however many years of marriage I had, and now I'm a single person, I really dread cooking. I love entertaining. This is my problem. I love entertaining. I love setting the table. I love welcoming people into my home. The whole cooking part of it just, it's so thank you.
Carolyn
Well, you need my book then.
Amy
You've given me, you've given me a fresh lens for which I'm grateful. I think I do need your book. Maybe you could write one for single people.
Tricia
What in your process of starting Mrs. Meyers Etiquette has surprised you? And how have you surprised yourself? You can do something that you didn't think you could do or...
Amy
Okay, well, I've surprised myself that I've done as well as I have. I think what has really surprised, and I have to say again, I could not have done this without my daughter, because she rides me – Mom, you're coming to town, you bring two outfits, we're gonna film, right? She does the posting, she posts my substacks, she's great. I think what surprised me is I think of myself as, I don't think of myself as old, but I'm like, okay, I'm this 64 year old woman in New Hampshire. And, you know, and I live here in the country with two donkeys and two goats and five wild dogs and people listen to me. I think that's what astounds me. And when I ran the political consulting firm, I found it was a very male dominated field, industry. And I found people would often underestimate me because of my age and my sex and that was useful. What I found in this business is sometimes people overestimate me and I have to step into that and that's good.
Tricia
I think all of us are in that place of taking up space. You're like, we can take up space. All of you and me, we've worked really hard to be able to say, I have this expertise. I have this authority in the best sense of the word. And we should be listened to because it's not like we just thought about this yesterday. It's been something that's been, we've been cultivating this for decades. I mean, I'm in the woods in New Hampshire too. We live what 40 minutes apart. These days, these, and you're in rural Georgia, aren't you Carolyn?
Carolyn
Most of the time, yes. I also am in South Carolina.
Tricia
But you It doesn't matter anymore where we are. You're not limited really by geography anymore. You can make what you need to make where you are. And so, I mean, one of the things that we say in the manifesto is constraints are opportunities. And all of us have had some sort of constraint that we're dealing with and overcoming that. So I want to ask, first of all, do either of you all want to ask the other one a question?
Amy
Well, I'm curious because I see so many of my friends are retiring, I feel like I'm just stepping into this new career and I'm thinking, oh, I could be doing this until I'm 80. Why not? Do you ladies feel a little bit out of step sometimes with your friends and your peers?
Carolyn
No, no, no, I don't.
Tricia
You don't?
Carolyn
Well, first off, my friends and peers are mainly, they all work. I mean, you know, they're in that. I mean, I do have relatives and stuff that are retired and they're golfing and all that. But I mean, that's not really my, my scene. I mean, I, I have, you know, a little bit more of when you're an artist, you hang out with people that are just they're on the creative track. They're not getting off. You know what I mean? They're not going to go, I'm going to go play golf now. I mean, that's not, that's not what they do. So, you know, I, I'm like, oh no. I mean, my friends are all just old and still hanging the paint, you know, just doing their thing.
Tricia
Older. The word is older, not old.
Carolyn
Older older sorry, you know, I'm not afraid. I'm not afraid of being old. I like people so, you know, I'm I like it.
Amy
I have to comment on the old comment. My mother is one of the most vibrant, interesting, engaged people I know, and I will not say her age publicly, but she is my mother. And her, she says, you cannot let the old man in. She refuses to accept limitation, so I try to hold to that.
Tricia
Beth, do you have anybody in your world, or do you feel out of step with the rest of the folks in your world?
Beth
In my day job, I'm working with people significantly younger than me. I'm even past the point of working with people that are my children's age, they're even younger than that. And I just feel like everybody just needs to listen to me. I've been there, done that, and I have to kind of guard myself a little bit against that. If the whole world just listened to me. But in terms of this project, in terms of this project, I just feel like it's such a gift to myself that I'm kind of letting me do something that's so important that I don't even feel like I'm working. I just feel like it's just such a form of creativity. And I think that's where Tricia and all of her wisdom and manifesto, it's made me realize that creative can be manifested in so many different ways. It's not just painting something, even though that's been a fun thing I've explored that I never thought I could paint anything. Cooking is a form of expression, teaching, etiquette, all of it is creativity. And so it's just tapped into a creative part of me that's been very fulfilling. And so I don't feel at all at a step with people, I just feel like everybody needs to get on my bandwagon and find out their passion and hey, here we go guys, let's do it.
Amy
I love it.
Tricia
I know what you mean a little bit though. mean, have friends, know, I have friends, my artist friends, they're never quitting. You know, the ones who are just curious and are doing what they're doing, they're either going to start a business or do this, or they're just going to be making and doing, that's just who they are, you know. Whether they need to do it as a form of income is different, but they're just going to do this stuff because that's what they're going to do. I have some other friends who are on a different track. You know, I don't have grandchildren, so I can't be playing with grandchildren. They don't exist. I like to surround myself with people who are, regardless of their age, are making something, are doing something new, are putting something out there that still have all this creative energy that they want to use. So thank you. Okay, I'm going to ask all of y'all the question I ask all of my guests. What do you need courage for right now? There's no right answer.
Beth
Well, I don't mind jumping in. Now that my app is complete and it's ready for the world, I need courage to really get out there and market it. Sometimes you create something and then it's almost like, my gosh, are people gonna like this? Are people gonna accept it? And I mean, it's a little bit of fear on my part, but I just need to really lean into it and just hopefully my passion will translate to other people and we're talking about people that are younger, that new moms, which is a whole new era. And I love the fact that Amy, you found yourself getting all these followers. I really want to take a page from your book and find out how you do that because that's such an important piece of marketing, but really not being afraid to really let the world know about this and to put it out there.
Tricia
Well, also Beth, because the world really needs this right now to have people understand and have connection through about how other cultures are in language and music. And it's just, it's a really important, it's very important what you're doing right now. So Carolyn, how about you? What courage do you need?
Carolyn
I mean, my courage, you know, with this book, I found that the people that were really loving it were millennials and Gen Z. And, you know, the women my age were just like, you know, I want to get out of the kitchen. I don't want to go in the kitchen. You know, they're tired of being in the kitchen. I get it. I mean, I get it. So, but they're like, but I'm giving it to my daughter and I'm giving it to my, you know, neighbor who's, you know, in there, whatever. But what I found is that, you know, they're not cranking out the cookbooks out of the churches anymore. You know, remember how you could find the books and this book is like a homage, you know, to those women who were just grinding it out, cooking and making these meals or this one recipe that everybody wants you to make a thousand times. I mean, so those books and the Junior League and all that stuff. All the cookbooks have turned into these table books, you know, that you're supposed to put out on the coffee table or whatever. I'm just like, y'all are losing what we're supposed to be doing here. Or it's some crazy, not crazy, a complicated chef who is like going, go get, you know, you have to have a ricer for your potatoes and all this stuff. I'm just like, no, no, no, no, we're eating over here. We're not five-star dining. So I'm like, I, I sold out, I sold 350 copies in two months. I did great. I was very excited. I went ahead and reordered. And so now I have copies and I'm like, I've got to get back out there and get it going again, you know, and I've had a bit of reprieve just because I needed it, you know, but, I will, I will, but it's like, it takes courage to reach out to these people that I do not know because my husband was like, well, now that you've sold it to all your friends, I mean, what are you gonna do? I'm like, really, it's true. I mean, I'm like, I can't ask them again, but I have to go to people that I kind of don't know and sell it to them, which I can as long as I can put a couple of the recipes out. I mean, people just stand there and go, okay, I want the book. But like I said, it is the younger crowd and I love connecting to them. I like being the person that's like, yes, I've been doing this for the last 40 years of my life and I do know like what you're saying, Beth, I do know what I'm doing. Not because I'm smarter than you, I've been here longer. That's what my mom used to say all the time. I've just been here longer than you. So I have this thing that I know, you and so that is that I gotta do that. I gotta get the courage and the chits back up.
Tricia
Okay, all right. Amy, how about you?
Amy
I think I'm with Beth. I need courage to persist. I'm very resilient, but I can easily get distracted. Courage to persist and to put myself out there. Because I truly believe I'm good at what I do and that I have a lot to offer and that there's a desperate need for it. So I actually got a call today from a private club. They want me to teach kids etiquette.
Not really my preference. Now, like we can't afford to pay you, but we'll give you a year's membership. I'm like, well I could take a year's membership. It's a, you know, it's a nice club in Boston. I’m like, I said, do I need to get three letters of recommendation before I can work for you for free? They said, no, no, we'll just give you the membership.
Tricia
That's a hoot.
Carolyn
That's awesome.
Tricia
Well, and that important point, there are different ways to be compensated. It doesn't always come in cash, but it has to be something that at least moves you forward, right? It gives you an audience forward. Carolyn, were you going to say something?
Carolyn
I was, I was going to tell Amy that back in the day when I worked at Jacobson's, I managed the children's department and I taught manners, Miss Manners for the children and loved it, had so much fun. And it was a complete blast. And I'm like, go girl, because Emily Post, you know, she was pretty rocking for a long time. I mean, we can have, you know, Miss Amy now. And I think it's fabulous. I do. I am just like, whoop, whoop. I mean, it is needed. It is needed and good for you.
Amy
Thank you.
Tricia
All three of you are doing things that are really needed, which is why I wanted to have you on the show. You know, I mean, it's important and it is, as Beth said, there is a legacy component to what y'all are doing and what you're passing on, but what you're teaching people through your creativity is how to connect in a way that really matters. Right now, in a world that's in some ways very broken and in other ways full with possibility. So all of you are the possibility that's awaiting. And so I'm really so tickled to have you on. And also because you're just women who said, I'm gonna do something. And that is fantastic. So thank you so much for being on the show. I'm so tickled that you joined us. And remember, it's no time to be timid out there. Thank you for embodying that.
Carolyn
Thank you, Tricia.
Amy
Thank you.
Beth
Great group, Tricia.
Tricia
Well, I think there's a business that might be able, or least some collaborations in the future.
Amy
I think so too.
Tricia
Thank you all so much. Thank you.
Tricia
I don’t know about you but hearing these women talk gives me hope for the world. And they got me thinking about some questions. First, do you have a creative project or a business you've been dreaming about but thought it was too late to start? Second, what did you love doing as a child? Can it be the seed for an adult passion? And last, have you surprised yourself lately about what you're able to accomplish? If you want to learn more about these creative powerhouses, you can follow Carolyn on Instagram @cbc233 or @carolyncooksandsocanyou. Learn more about Beth and her app at firstsounds.com and follow Amy on Instagram @mrsmeyersetiquette. Check out the show notes for more information as well.
Thanks for joining us. If you have any questions, feel free to reach out to us at podcast@triciaroseburt.com. And if you liked this episode, please share it with one other person that you think will enjoy it. Then maybe talk to them about the parts that resonate. It really helps build our audience. And remember, this is no time to be timid.
No Time to Be Timid is written and produced by me, Tricia Rose Burt. Our episodes are produced and scored by Adam Arnone of Echo Finch. And our executive producers are Amy Grant, Nancy Perot, and Sage Wheeler. I'd also like to thank contributors to my Fractured Atlas Fiscal Sponsorship, which helps make this podcast happen. No Time to Be Timid is a presentation of I Will Be Good Productions.